Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
