That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
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