At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
