dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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