I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
