it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
