what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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