Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
