I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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