i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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