I want to stick my p in your. b.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
