So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
