it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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