she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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