I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
