I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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