I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
