PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize