doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Randomize
