I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize