at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
