but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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