question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
