you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
