I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
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