I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
