3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
