she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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