Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
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Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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