these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
