You just made me feel so damn special
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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