I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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