I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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