He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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