He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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