that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
