he told me I talked like a deaf person
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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