actually, I'm a sock model
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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