is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
