____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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