Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
