Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
