Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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