Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
