I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
