On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
