I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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