I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Randomize
