Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
