i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
