it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
