this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
